I just had a really important realization: it’s not that
people are doing such special things with their lives. It’s that they are
finding special things in what they do.
So my rainy soul miasma doesn't come from me not doing something special with
my life; it’s that I refuse to acknowledge that my life is special.
With that in mind, I am going to try harder to reflect on each day for the foreseeable future and find the meaning in it.
That being said, today I started back to school--teaching, not taking. Chatham starts again on August 26th, so I have some time. Today was the start of the Freshman Academy Success Academy, which is 8 days of acclimation for the kids coming into ninth grade. (On a side note, I love my job, and I am really happy that they moved me to ninth grade English. Wonderful!)
The day started with a welcome presentation in the Auditorium. Two boys in the row in front of me-one that is rather nondescript, and one that has a Green Hat--have cell phones out- I give them a few seconds to exit out of apps and put them away, but of course, they don't. I went over to them and tell them to put them away. And I tried to smile while I did it, but I'm self conscious about whether or not I look psycho or just inviting. They do put the phones away, though, and there was minimal lip about it, so I chalked it up as a win. A few minutes later, I noticed another boy, K (as we'll find out soon enough) had his cell phone out, on his lap, kind of hidden under his shirt, but not really. It looked like he is preparing to do something with it; he's trying to be sneaky, maybe, but maybe not? I leaned in.
"Put that away," I stage whispered, realizing I'm pointing to his crotch as I do it. I wait for him to be snarky, but he isn't, to his credit.
"What?" He asks.
"The cell phone. Put it away." I gestured again.
"Jeez, ok. Calm down." He slowly put it in his back pocket.
Normally, telling me to calm down is the best way to rile me up (just ask a few from last year). I think about getting snarky back, but I don't, and put my stupid smile on again.
I spend the rest of the time trying to get Green Hat boy to pay attention and stop talking and the two girls around K to stop talking. I look longingly at the back of the auditorium a few times. I scream "CR!" when the athletic director yells "WE ARE" to get the kids pumped up. The two girls and K look at me funny.
When the students came to the classroom after the presentations, K walked in to mine, meaning it is 95% likely have him this year. (I'm suddenly glad that I didn't snark at him earlier.) I gave the kids a thought exercise (they are going on a year-long trip to mars, and they have a 13 member crew. They have to decide which four people to send back to Earth, and explain why). The discussion was really fun, and at the end we had about ten minutes left. Throughout the course of the period I had been trying to be upbeat and chill (for example, one of the groups said they would bring a 24 year old,beautiful, intelligent woman with a drug problem on the Mars trip. Their reasoning? "She'll be easy to take advantage of since she'll need drugs." Rather than flip the eff out on them and kick them out of class, I talked them through why that was so incredibly inappropriate.) I gave the kids the extra time to ask me questions about the high school, and classes, and all that jazz.
When their questions petered off, I took some quick surveys--who read the summer books, who liked it, who would consider themselves an "English" person, etc--and K asked if they had had to read the summer books.
"Because I didn't read mine. Well, I read the title page. I mean, what are we going to do with them?"
I smiled when he said he didn't even read it, so he relaxed a bit, I think. I told them I wasn't sure what exactly we were doing with the books for the year.
"It's OK that you don't like to read, K. Not everyone is an English person. I'm not a math person. I try to structure things--I mean, it is high school, and so you will have to read something--but you remind me of a girl last year who said, 'Ms. B, I haven't read a book yet and I'm not going to this year, either.' At the end of the year she held out a book that she choose and said, 'Ms. B, I read this, and I read it for you.' So, you know, hopefully you'll find something you like and you'll read that this year, and it'll be a good class for you. But it's OK if you don't like English. I don't mind." (I was rambly).
K told me about a book he did read last year, although he can't remember the title or anything about it (he was under pressure, so that's OK). He ended it with,
"Yeah, well, I think I'll like English this year. It always depends so much on the teacher, you know?"
And I got all warm and fuzzy inside. He thinks I'm a cool teacher already! Yay! (World: remind me of this when K and I are inevitably SCREAMING it out during research paper season) :-D
I saw Green Hat a few times throughout the day, too, and he was either mocking me by saying hi and pretending to be friendly or he thinks I really like him because I yelled at him a lot during the presentations. I'm not sure which...
I saw a girl writing at lunch instead of eating, and told her about creative writing club (which I just typed as creative wiring club. They might become sister clubs in the future...). She was literally speechless for a second, and then bumbled all her words in excitement. I also helped her open her locker later.
So, three people that think I'm OK: at least one that I made really happy, and two that seem to like me that might not have if I had given into my more cranky tendencies. A good count for the day.
Bonus story!: Today, as the kids were getting their stuff in the cafeteria, a bat came out of nowhere and dive bombed my assistant principal. The girls were screaming! No idea what happened to the bat. When asked if it was a bird by a student, I told her yes it was.
"A nocturnal bird. With leathery wings."
I mean, I can't go cold turkey on the sarcasm!
Best part of the day: A tie between a bat bearing down on my boss in the cafeteria and K telling me he thinks he's going to like English this year.
Quote of the day:
Me: Think about what you are going to say before you say it. If you wouldn't say it in front of your grandmother, don't say it in my classroom.
Kid: But my grandmother's weird...Ok, I'll think as I speak!
Me: *Evil Glare with half smile smirk.*
Kid: Ok, before I speak.
Me: There you go! *hopefully not psychotic grin.*
Song for today: School's out for summ...oh, wait. Sorry!
